Bonded

I wanted to throw a temper tantrum with tears and kicks when my eyes were opened to the fact that part of my deeper damage is the betrayal bond I have with you.

My body and brain are disconnected when I listen to you. It’s taken this long to realize that I am holding my breath in fear. I am trying to self-protect and brace myself for what you might tell me.

But when I’m talking to you about me, I hold nothing back. I want to be known and loved by you. Including you listening to the pain of my broken heart…that you broke. And I know it’s messed up. I want you to comfort me.

I know we are bonded. I hope there is more than just the betrayal bond holding us together.